sometimes it's ok to be...

Sad.

A few days ago I found out that one of my cousins had died in car crash.  While I have to admit that he wasn't one of my closest cousins, he was one I had hung out with a few times outside of family functions, and he was really a great guy.  Billy was one I would actually admit was a part of my family.

Death is an odd thing.  When it happens to someone you only see every year or so, it doesn't seem as final as it does when it is someone you are close with.  If it is a close friend, a neighbor, a sibling, a parent, etc.  Someone you connect with on a daily or weekly basis, there comes such a range of emotions.  But when it is someone less close, the emotions are different.

I think this is what has me in a funk.

Not the Stay in bed all day kind of funk, or the go weeks without showering kind of funk.

The kind of funk that leaves you feeling a little melancholy, a little retrospective, a little wistful and thoughtful as to what is really going on in your life.  Tonight what sound good to me is to eat a box of chocolate, drink a bottle of wine and listen to something emotional - like maybe a little Adele....

The waiting game

So here I am - 9 days after getting the prize notification - and still no other communication from them.  A lesser person might be worried....awe heck, I AM worried - but the letter did say 7 BUSINESS days, and of course my luck there was a stinking holiday in there, so technically I am just at 6 BUSINESS days....oh and then there is this....

My name (though slightly misspelled) is there - listed as a Winner! 

SHUT THE DOOR!!!!!!

So yesterday the hubster and I are kicking it (aka cleaning the living room) and Fed Ex pulls up.  I often order things I forget about - and while I knew I had some things coming in the mail, I was pretty sure I hadn't received any shipping notifications and what I had ordered was supposed to come via UPS.

So he goes to get it and I remember!  A computer charger - my laptop cord died and I ordered a new one...

So goes the conversation...

He gets the package and I ask - my computer cord?

Him - No...

Me - what is it then - bank paperwork?

Him - no, it's addressed to you.

Me - what?

I get the envelope and read... Ventura Associates ... NY...

OMG


Am I getting sued!


Why am I getting sued!


Am I having to testify for something?


What in the world...

Hubby sees my look of terror (and before you read further I don't have any reason to be sued, and have never been sued, but mistakes are made and people get slapped with lawsuits....

I've never saw it happen IRL

but on the good wife, la law, Fairly legal, drop dead diva, PEOPLE"S COURT

ACCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!

So I tear open the envelope...

Ventura Associates
blah blah blah

my address
yeah I know it already

Dear Melissa
yeah - that's me

Important Notice!
dear God how much is this going to cost me?
will I have to sell my car?
my first born?
my second born?

Ventura Associates International, L.L.C. is the independent judging organization for the One More Disney Day Sweepstakes...We are responsible for determining the winner(s) ...you have been selected as a "potential winner...We say "potential winner" because...blah blah you have to sign and notarize this paper saying you didn't cheat, you are who you are, you live where you live...yada yada yada....

DH is looking at my face like whats wrong

I am thinking NO FREAKING WAY

normal people don't win this
you see them on commercials and they aren't normal
NO FREAKING WAY

so I tell him, he doesn't believe me

I give him the letter

he still doesn't believe me

it took some convincing - but he now believes...

So we rushed off to get the paper work notarized and fed-ex'd back to NY

I then spent every few hours yesterday and today checking to see where it was via my tracking number

it was delivered today - at 11:12am

and now I wait, because of course it said you will hear back in 7 days...

and so I wait...

Christmas Eve Eve Eve

That's what my kids are calling tonight anyway... Creative aren't they?  My shopping list was completed weeks ago, however I manage to find myself in the stores snatching up bargains to use for occasions down the road.   Andrew's birthday is only 3 weeks after Christmas, so I have taken advantage of Christmas sales and am now mostly done shopping for him.

I've even managed to stick some things back for the girls.  Target had a great sale on Barbie movies and my girls love them...I am not going to pay 9, or 12, or 19 for them, but 3.99 and 2.99 - heck yeah.

Tonight is the last night hubby will have to work for a bit, so we are going to hit the county light display and spend the night in a hotel with indoor pool so the kids can swim and we can stay up watching Christmas movies.

We aren't sure what plans we will have for Christmas Eve, but I am sure it will involve cleaning and wrapping and baking yummies in the oven.

It's Christmas time in the City....

It's our first Christmas in a new town.  Its the first year we have not visited Mike's Farm Since 2004.  I have to admit I am a little sad.  Not quite sad enough to take the drive up to do it (maybe next year), but sad still the same.  The new neighborhood is decked out with lights.  There are a lot more houses here covered in lights than in our old hood.  Enough that when we return to the home and it is dark, we (me and the kids) usually drive around a block or two to look at the lights.  There are 2 "drives of lights" that we are planning on doing later this month.  Of course we are waiting till probably the busiest nights, but that is the only night we are free.

The house is only half decorated...well to the normal untrained eye you would think it is in fact really decorated, but I have boxes and boxes of Christmas decorations in the garage that we didn't even begin to go through.  In fact my garage right now is pretty full of boxes.

I think through all this I am just a little sad.  I can't put a finger on it, but I feel really melancholy.  There are so many things we usually do, but with Mike's schedule some things haven't been done because I am not supermom all the time.   I am trying to make up for some things.  The kids are off all week, so I have several fun things planned.  One day we are going to make cinnamon ornaments.  Another we are going to decorate our gingerbread houses, another we are going to bake cookies.  and I think one night we are going to stay in a hotel, watch Christmas movies and swim in a heated pool...

I am already looking forward to next year.  I intent on blogging more and losing more weight.  (Yeah I know  - said it before...but If I don't at least try I will never succeed...right?

Funny things that kids say...

Iz:  Mom why did you get me these pajamas....they have a ZIPPER...I mean come on...I live the letter "Z" but I don't love zippers....


For those who have never met Iz...she is quite an interesting child.  Full on DRAMA 100% of the time.  She spends most of her day here at the house dancing around the room singing crosses between made up songs and real songs.  When we are walking places she skips rather than walks and she currently is obsessed with being a girl DJ that wears dresses with pants under them (whatever that means).  I am not even sure she know what being a DJ really is - she just likes they way they dress.

A whole new world....

So over 2 months ago I last posted that we were moving.  Just in case you are a regular reader and are dying to know what happened....we moved.  It was HELL.  the end.

Well not exactly the end.  Living here has been an adjustment.  Things have had their ups and downs

For Example:
Andrew and Isabel are doing great in school.
Eve is finally sleeping through the night again.
We have a steady income coming in.
We are mostly unpacked.

and the downs...
We haven't even begun to unpack the garage.
Mike got a ticket the other day when he was on the way back with the last of our stuff.
I have gained 5lbs in the last week.
There are too many places to explore and shop.

So that's it in a nutshell...I do promise to blog more - so stay tuned....